Baseball Twats

Someone directed me towards Barry Davis of Sportsnet's twitter account, which is full of either Captain Obvious tweets or Canada Dry tweets. A sampling of perhaps the least insightful sports analysis on the planet, and what my response would be:


Barry Davis Actual Tweet: "I see Josh Towers still can't pitch. Hits Randy Ruiz in the face with a pitch. The dude is just brutal"

All Your Base Response: "Going up and in on a guy in a 0-2 count is pretty much the definition of major league pitching. Ruiz simply didn't pick up the ball. But hey, piling on Towers is pretty much par for the course in Toronto's media."

Barry Davis Actual Tweet: "Scott Downs on to pitch the 8th. His first appearance since August 1st"

All Your Base Response: Contrary to popular belief, Downs does not write J.M.J. (Jesus Mary Joseph) in the dirt behind the mound before he pitches. He actually writes the initials of his two children. Know what I did just there? Provided information about Scott Downs that is actually somewhat interesting.


Barry Davis Actual Tweet: "Travis Snider belts his 6th Homerun off windows retaurant and it left in a hurry. His 3rd since being recalled last week "

All Your Base Response: "Instead of following Gameday, why don't we follow Barry Davis' sporadic tweets which give little information, and random updates of rather trivial points of Jays games?"

Barry Davis Actual Tweet: "Roenicke in trouble in the 5th . After 2 quick outs he gives up a walk and 2 singles . Now 7-2 Rays

All Your Base Response: "Is this fucking serious?"

1 comment:

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